Whats the cost of a friendship???

How wrong you were-Jeanine

Ok so let me just explain where I am coming from. Do with it what you like, believe me or not. Really at this point I could give a flying fuck. I have nothing to lose here so there is no reason for me to be anything but honest. You want to know whats up with me and Ted, well here goes. Now just take into mind that sometimes the truth hurts. Ok so met Ted over a year and a half ago. He used to be such a sweetheart. We really didn't connect on a romantic level his dysfunctional problems were a lil much for me. But he was an awesome friend. We used to talk and talk and talk. Hes pretty intelligent knows a lil bit about alot of different subjects. So in November my father was diagnosed with esophageal cancer and I just about lost my mind seriously thought about just giving up . Thats where if it werent for Ted I prolly wouldn't be here today. I would go to work come home and lock myself in my room, get on my computer and no one really wanted to talk to me cuz I was pretty messed up, but not Ted he would listen to me, once in awhile comment but for the most part he just listened. Just knowing he was there on the other side of technology got me thru some rough times in my life and I got used to that. Got used to using him as my safety net. I know I drove him nuts at times, and I still do. I have so much love and respect for this man and thing he is the best and I will never forget what he has done for me. He is my best friend.

well he was anyways. He's been my rock and used to be my greatest motivator and the most positive person I had ever met. This is no longer the case tho, and its been a hard pill to swallow. When you came into his life all that changed, you apparently are one of those people who don't believe and man and woman can be friends without there being any sexual ties. But I am here to tell you they do exist. I wasn't completely accepting of you mainly because I knew that my friendship would soon become non-existant , his friendship is something I never wanted to lose, and  I fought long and hard to not lose it. He repeatedly asked me not to text message him, not to send him emails or instant messages which I thought was totally unfair. Your my friend damn it, wtf not like I'm trying to seduce you . So it started, and I kept doing things the way I always had, hardheaded to the bone. Well, he constantly yelled at me and bitched at me for the text messages or emails and I just kept ignoring his wishes, I wasn't gonna let you or anyone else take my friend away from me, I needed his friendship. So I get drunk one night and start spitting out some inappropriate emails, only I thought I had only sent one. But seriously like I said I have nothing to hide, I am very upset with the fact that I have now lost his friendship and it will be very hard not having him to lean on or cry to. You really dont even know what kind of awesome man you have and are destroying. Hes not such a sweetheart anymore, hes mean and hurtful nothing like what he used to be. But I;m really not going to go on about what he used to be because its all pointless for me at ths point. I am the one who lost here and you won. You finally managed to get me out of his life. I do hope you are happy now. It will take sometime for my hurt to go away, as well as old habits are hard to change but I will do my best not to contact him. If for some reason you wish to discuss this further, shoot me an email and we can make arrangements to get together.Also just a couple more things I would like to add, well more so a lil bit of advice to you, all the energy you put into researching and thinking you've found something on him you really should put into loving him and tursting him. He doesn't deserve all this he really is an awesome guy and in my heart I will never believe anything different. Unfortunately all this bullshit has cause me to pay the ultimate price of losing a friendship that was based on all the wonderful qualities Ted used to have, all of that is gone now. If you truly care about him I would seriously consider making some changes instead of pushing him away. Seems pretty pointless at this point but maybe you should of taken the time to possibly get to know me and you would of found out that our friendship was just that a friendship and nothing more. I have a pretty fucked up past as far as relationships goes but you cannot base every man on the past and its really unfair to Ted for you to continue living in the past because you aren't even giving your relationship a fighting chance to survive with all the negative jealousy and insecurity. Really not my business but as I said before I have nothing left to lose, I lost what was important to me and you are going to too if you dont stop this madness. Good luck I truly hope you work this out and find a way to be happy;  

Rochelle