Start by holding your fingers against her closed labia   and "PAY ATTENTION" to how she positions herself and grinds against you  This is "YOUR CLUE" to where she wants you to concentrate and how much pressure   she requires. At all times her hip movements - how fast and how furiously    she grinds them next against your hand - are your guide to the pressure and speed she is craving. If she is not grinding against your hand at all, you are either doing it perfectly (GOLD STAR)    or she is unsure of how you will react is she gives you feed back...